When do I stop asking questions about my husbands affair?

Hang in there. I've been reading your questions, and I feel for you. I think you are very brave for trying to work this out- and because of that I think it's completely reasonable for you to be allowed as much time as you need to come to terms with it. If you have questions- ask away, if you need more information- go out and get it. Before recommitting to him and your marriage- have all the answers and resolution that you need. If you can't get them, or don't get them, then you know you will never rebuild that trust and connection, and that's when it's time to stop trying.